Not All in Your Head: Making Sense of Autoimmune Disease
When I was first diagnosed with autoimmune disease, I felt like I was losing my mind. Some days I could power through, while other days I could barely get out of bed. My symptoms shifted constantly, from joint pain, fatigue, and brain fog, yet on the outside, I “looked fine.” The confusion, the lack of answers, and the disbelief from others often made me wonder if it was all in my head. If you love someone with an autoimmune condition, this may sound familiar.
Autoimmune disease does NOT play by the rules. It can manifest differently in every individual, flare up without warning, and leave patients feeling misunderstood, sometimes even questioning their own sanity.
This blog is for the families and friends of those living with autoimmune conditions. It is meant to help you understand what is really going on, why it can feel “crazy,” and how you can offer the kind of support that truly makes a difference.
What Is Autoimmune Disease?
Your immune system is designed to protect you from viruses, bacteria, and other harmful invaders. However, in autoimmune disease, the body mistakenly attacks its own healthy cells and tissues. Over 80 different autoimmune conditions have been identified, including rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, multiple sclerosis, Sjogren’s disease, celiac disease, and Hashimoto’s thyroiditis.
Because autoimmune disease can affect different organs and systems, symptoms range widely. These can include joint pain, fatigue, and digestive issues, as well as rashes, brain fog, or nerve problems. That is why autoimmune disease is often called “the great imitator.”
What Causes Autoimmune Disease?
There is not one single cause, but rather a combination of factors that increase risk:
Genetics. Family history may predispose someone.
Environment. Toxins, infections, or even stress can trigger symptoms.
Hormones. Women are affected more often, particularly during hormonal shifts like pregnancy or menopause.
Diet and lifestyle. Chronic inflammation, gut imbalances, and nutrient deficiencies can worsen the immune system’s misfire.
Why Diagnosis Takes So Long
On average, it can take four years or more for someone to receive an accurate autoimmune diagnosis. Here is why:
Symptoms overlap with many other conditions. Fatigue, joint pain, and digestive issues could point to thyroid disease, depression, IBS, or stress.
Blood tests are not always definitive. Markers may come back “normal” even when symptoms are very real.
Symptoms can come and go, making patterns hard to detect.
Many autoimmune diseases are invisible, so patients may feel dismissed or told it is “all in their head.”
This long road often leaves people frustrated, exhausted, and doubting themselves, which is why family support is so critical.
Why It Can Feel Like You Are “Losing It”
For those living with autoimmune conditions, the unpredictable and invisible nature of the illness can be maddening:
Unpredictable flares. Stress, infections, weather, or even certain foods can trigger symptoms without warning.
Invisible pain. Loved ones may say, “But you look fine,” which only adds to feelings of isolation.
Mixed medical messages. Testing may not always confirm what the person is experiencing.
Emotional rollercoaster. Living with uncertainty often fuels anxiety, depression, and self-doubt.
It is no wonder many people with autoimmune disease describe feeling “crazy.” The truth is, they are not. Their bodies are sending real signals, even if those signals are invisible to the outside world.
The Role of Inflammation in Autoimmune Disease
Inflammation is your body’s natural defense system. In the short term, it is helpful. It heals a cut, fights off a cold, or supports recovery from injury. However, in autoimmune disease, the immune system does not shut off properly. Instead of resolving, inflammation becomes chronic.
That ongoing, low-grade inflammation drives many of the symptoms people experience:
Fatigue from the body constantly being in fight mode
Pain and stiffness from inflamed joints, muscles, or tissues
Brain fog, memory lapses, and mood changes linked to inflammation in the nervous system
Digestive issues tied to inflammation in the gut lining and microbiome
When the Nervous System Gets Involved
Chronic inflammation does not just affect joints or digestion. It can also disrupt the central and peripheral nervous systems. This helps explain why so many people with autoimmune disease experience:
Difficulty concentrating or brain fog
Memory challenges
Heightened anxiety or depression
Sleep disturbances
Sensory sensitivities to light, sound, or temperature
Numbness, tingling, or weakness in the arms and legs
These neurological symptoms can be frightening, not only for the person experiencing them but also for loved ones. To an outsider, they may seem random or exaggerated, but they are very real. They reflect the way chronic inflammation can affect the body at every level. This is why autoimmune conditions can feel like they affect the whole person. Chronic inflammation does not stay neatly contained.
For me, this chronic inflammation was the turning point. When I began to understand that inflammation, including its effects on the nervous system and even my limbs, was at the root of my symptoms, everything clicked. Instead of chasing each symptom separately, I focused on calming my immune system and lowering that hidden inflammation. That shift, born out of desperation, research, and trial and error, changed the course of my health.
How Families Can Support Loved Ones
Here is where your role becomes invaluable. Your understanding can ease the mental and emotional burden:
Believe them. Validate what they are experiencing, even when you cannot see it.
Be flexible. Last minute cancellations or rest days are not laziness. They are survival.
Offer help with dignity. Instead of pity, try asking, “What can I take off your plate today?”
Learn together. Read about their condition so you understand why they may need to avoid certain foods, conserve energy, or take medications.
Acknowledge the mental toll. Compassion for the emotional side is just as important as for the physical symptoms.
How an Anti Inflammatory Eating Plan Helps
While food alone does not cure autoimmune disease, nutrition plays a powerful role in calming the immune system and reducing flares. An anti inflammatory approach helps by:
Supporting gut health, where much of the immune system lives
Balancing blood sugar and hormones
Providing antioxidants and omega 3 fatty acids that reduce inflammation
Removing foods that may worsen symptoms, such as processed foods, refined sugars, and certain oils
Lifestyle Activities That Help Reduce Inflammation
Nutrition is a cornerstone, but lifestyle plays just as important a role in calming inflammation and supporting the immune system. Here are some simple, evidence based practices that make a meaningful difference:
Movement, not just exercise. Regular physical activity helps regulate the immune system, improve circulation, and reduce inflammatory markers. Even light daily movement like walking, stretching, or yoga can calm the body’s alarm system.
Stress management. Chronic stress keeps cortisol and adrenaline elevated, which fuels inflammation. Meditation, deep breathing, journaling, or time in nature can help the immune system reset.
Quality sleep. During deep sleep, the body repairs tissues and regulates inflammation. Poor sleep increases inflammatory markers. A consistent sleep routine is one of the most powerful anti inflammatory tools.
Hydration. Staying hydrated supports lymphatic flow, joint health, and detoxification.
Connection and joy. Loneliness and negative emotions are linked to higher inflammation, while positive relationships and laughter can lower inflammatory markers. Making time for joy is not optional. It is medicine.
Together with an anti inflammatory eating plan, these practices create a strong foundation for reducing flares, improving energy, and supporting overall resilience.
My Personal Journey: From Struggle to Support
These principles are not just professional theories. They come from my own lived experience. I know what it feels like to struggle with autoimmune disease, to feel desperate for answers, and to be told “your labs look fine” even when I knew something was not right. Through years of research, trial and error, and a fierce determination to heal myself, I discovered the power of anti inflammatory nutrition and lifestyle changes.
Out of that journey, I created Phil’s 30 Day-REBOOT and wrote Cracking The Food Code, practical, evidence based resources designed to help others reduce inflammation, reset their metabolism, and reclaim their health.
Autoimmune disease can leave people feeling as though their body has turned against them. But here is the truth. You do not need to do this alone. You do not need someone to fix you. You need support, compassion, and reassurance that healing is possible. Sometimes the most powerful medicine comes from being believed, encouraged, and walking the journey with others who understand.
Hope for Healing, One Step at a Time
If you or someone you love is living with autoimmune disease, please know this. You do not have to walk this path alone. Small, consistent changes in food and lifestyle can make a powerful difference in how you feel. That is exactly why I created these resources, born from both my professional training and my personal fight for wellness:
Phil’s 30 Day REBOOT
A powerful online metabolic reset designed to help you break free from the cycle of dieting. It helps you reset your metabolism, refuel your body with optimal nutrition, and rewire your mindset so you can build lasting, sustainable habits.
Cracking The Food Code
An essential guide to breaking free from diets and quick fixes. This book delivers personalized nutrition strategies, helps you navigate your health journey without deprivation, and provides real tools for long term results.
Both resources are ideal for anyone ready to restore energy, reduce inflammation, support gut health, and achieve long term wellness through real, lasting change.
True healing begins with understanding, grace, and the courage to move forward, even when the path feels uncertain. Every choice matters, and together, we can turn hope into progress.
With love and compassion,
Phil
A Supportive Next Step
If you are navigating inflammation, autoimmune symptoms, or simply looking for gentle ways to support your body day to day, I put together a simple Anti-Inflammatory Drinks Guide to go along with this conversation.
It includes green tea elixirs and fresh juices designed to help calm inflammation, support gut health, and nourish your body in a practical, approachable way.
Download the Anti-Inflammatory Drinks Guide here.
© 2025 Phil Knows Food. All rights reserved. Not medical advice. For informational purposes only. No reproduction or distribution without written permission. Full Disclaimer
